Gossip Links

Lindsay Lohan has started going to AA (NYPOST)

Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler (the chick who tried to kick Paris Hilton's ass for making out with Travis - aka my hero) getting back together? Hmm. (TMZ)

Paris teaches Britney how to strip. Okay. (THE SUN)

...Oh, and Britney Spears is also bisexual (THE SUN)

Anna Nicole Smith is exported (TMZ)

GQ hosted a party, here are some pics... yes, free booze, Lindsay Lohan was there (MOLLYGOOD)

Britney Spears goes out in pants. No one cares. (I'M NOT OBSESSED)

Her heart is in the right place, but Lindsay Lohan is retarded. And can't spell. And is retarded. (THE INDEPENDENT)

...and, apparently, a coked-out whore (X17 ONLINE)

No words. (D-LISTED)

Not a Britney post!

...well, I guess it kind of is since it involves Britney's new boyfriend Paris, out on the town for the first time in days without her. Here is Paris Hilton, looking like shit. Here is Nicole Richie with her new breast implants. That is all.

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And now...day 3.

Britney last night.

Sans panties.

A
-fucking
-gain.

I am, honestly, too furious to type... lame, but true. Grr.
An uncensored pic of her here (not a close up - thank god).

...and a close-up. Is it her private area or peachish panties? I really can't tell. Hmm. Please discuss.

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Caption Winner!

" aaaaaa! for christsake put on panties already! Oh, wait, my mistake, that's her mouth this time." -anonymous


Congratulations if this is you, but since you wrote the caption for a contest and chose to remain anonymous, I have no idea how to reward you. So, um, thanks for entering, you win, you are funny, but please, leave a name next time so I can give you your reward? I know it's not the coolest thing to win, but I was going to enjoy analyzing somebody's sworn enemy. Well, there's always next time. Thanks to all for your humorous comments.

Booooo-rrrring.

I think that somebody is desperate for attention, and her name is Lindsay Lohan. How lame... going to a store and buying gold handcuffs just to show them off to the waiting paparazzi, shamefully trying to detract attention from the new BFF's Britney and Paris.
So sad.

Caption this!

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Okay, so since I'm without a lot of money, I don't have much to offer contest-wise, so here's what I came up with: if you come up with the best caption, I'll let you know, and you can send me a picture of yourself, or, even better, a picture of someone you don't like, and I'll put it on my blog, along with some scathing commentary for all to enjoy, sandwiched between all of the other celebrity pictures. What fun! See, everyone wins! Not really.

If you're listening to the show, you'll know why I'm posting this

good fucking god.

Okay, sorry, I know my language isn't safe for work, but jesus fucking christ - what is Britney Spears doing?? These pictures are too vulgar for even ME to post, and that's saying something.

So, last night Britney decided to go out -again- with Paris Hilton, and ONCE AGAIN SANS PANTIES! Why, Britney? That is so gross and wrong and saggy and gross and wrong! Keep your naughty bits tucked away! I don't want to see your vag, let alone your c-section scar (yes, the pictures show her from belly-button to ass - sick). So, since I don't want to post these, I'll direct you to the fine fellows at What Would Tyler Durden Do? who have them up for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy! Throw up!

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EDIT: Here is a safe-for-work picture of Britney's ass from a couple of nights ago when she was out with Paris Hilton. Why, Britney, Why?

Anyone remember The Facts of Life?

In case you need some refreshing, this is what Lisa Whelchel used to look like, when she played Blair Warner on Facts of Life. Oh boy. Looks like she raided Britney Spears shitty hair extension collection.

BTW, this is a real picture, no photoshop.

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This posting is where I COULD post Tom Cruise / Katie Holmes wedding news...

...but I don't care enough to, nor do I want to. I'm not going to support Katie Holmes, who was once a talented actress, finally marrying a forty-something mental case who has ruined her career and completely brainwashed her. Instead, here is a picture of her from Thank You for Smoking... the movie that she could have possibly won an Oscar for her part, but she declined.
R.I.P. Katie Holmes' career.

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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Stay away from Britney, you whorey girl! This is when she's supposed to clean UP her image, not hang around with Skanky McSkankerson herself. Although I have to say, Britney is wearing the worst outfit I've seen in awhile.

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Kevin Federline getting text message from Britney Spears about the divorce (by request)

Lindsay Lohan: cutter?

Well, that's kind of sucky. Her publicist says that she "fell in some bushes". Sure. She's been wearing either a bandage or a thick bracelet on that arm for months... looks like we know why now.


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Tom Cruise, Suri, Katie Holmes and Chris Klein (a.k.a. "the real father")

I mean, come on. Tom Cruise is trying to pass this off as his kid? Yeah, I'm not thinking so. Pictured below Tom & Suri is Chris Klein, Katie Holmes ex-boyfriend that she broke up with mere days before she started seeing Tom Cruise and became, ahem, pregnant. Suri's resemblance to Chris, at least to me, is uncanny. That is totally his kid. As a sidenote, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were seen today at City Hall in Rome filling out paperwork, meaning that they are probably married already - I'm kind of disappointed that she didn't escape. Oh well. Guess now we'll just have to stay tuned for the divorce.

My Chemical Romance: Welcome to the Black Parade

...I'm a big fan of the album, but I'm not 100% about the video. I think it's pretty, but the concept kind of becomes lost to me - I'm digging the marching band suits that look like ribcages, though. Comments?

Jocelyn Wildenstein (aka Cat Lady) that Rick is obsessed with:

Where has Star Jones been hiding?

Oh, there she is! I think she dropped her foundation when she was attempting to put it on her face, because it is ALL over her freak chest. Remember awhile back when she got the girls enlarged & lifted? I think she's trying to cover the scars (because she has them aplenty) and not doing a good job. Honey, if you're going to use the right color of make-up for your face, maybe you should try and use it for the rest of your body as well - might match up better. Ick.

EDIT: oh happy day... I found more Star Jones pictures. Enjoy!

sigh.

Joshua Jackson and his girlfriend Diane Kruger at the Chicago musical after-party last night.
Ah, memories.

What do you guys think of his lady?

A message for Britney Spears...

...left on the shower door of his dressing room from none other than Kevin Federline. He left this after he played his show full of ticket-holders that were there because a) the tickets were free or b) they wanted to catch a glimpse of Britney. This has been compared to his actual signature by many, and it's an exact match. What a moron, eh? Maybe he would have a stronger case to get custody of his two kids with Britney if he gave a shit about the first two he had with Shar Jackson. Yeah, that's right, Kevin, you already have other kids you should care about - you should have just written the truth: "Fuck a wife, give me money bitch!". Somebody should put this jack-ass out of his misery.

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Vampire Kirsten Dunst

THIS WOMAN HAS SLEPT WITH JAKE GYLLENHAAL. And I have not. Cruel, cruel world.