Nevermind - THIS is the greatest magazine cover.

Kevin Federline & Britney Spears' mom?? Man oh man, when is this shit going to stop??? I feel like my head might explode!!!!
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On the rare chance you haven't seen this yet...

...I give you - Chocolate Rain.

Best magazine cover EVER.

"Topless, drunk and lonely"= Best. Phrase. Ever. (To see what incident they are referring to, see two posts down)
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Whatever happened to Lauren Hill?

no words.
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Britney Spears takes off her top and makes out with some random dude in a pool. Downward spiral continues.

Here's the story in case you're interested:

And now, the always glorious Sun UK has pictures of Britney, topless and drunk in a pool making out with a guy she just met. They also have new details, which can only be described by whatever word means the exact opposite of "shocking". And yes, she tried to F a gay guy. (NOTE - the Sun calls him "Mike Encinias", Us magazine calls him "Matt Encinias", I call him the luckiest man in the whole world.)


Britney’s assistant hand-picked Mike and a group of male pals to go to her hotel for drinks by the pool.
Mike explained: “Britney was drinking Mojitos and she’d been drinking some Jack Daniel’s
“Suddenly she shocked everyone by just stripping out of her top.
“She went into the pool topless - her boobs were exposed and she had a drink in her hand and a hat on with sunglasses.”
Mike says he kissed Britney after her assistant told him the singer wanted to “make out” with him.
He said: “She straddled me and put her legs around me.
“When I started kissing her I did everything in my power - from my previous experience of kissing girls - not to mess it up.
“Britney had more drinks - she was having Jack and more Mojitos in between me feeling her up, her boobs, and kissing her on her neck.
“Her body was very nice. It was sexual and sensual kissing. It took some effort to perfect.
“She is a great kisser - I’d actually say a phenomenal kisser.”
Mike was invited back to Britney’s suite once the party was over at 4am.
He said: “I went in and found Britney lying on the bed with her knees up and just a pair of pink panties on.
“She was looking like she was ready - and I wanted to finalise it.”
He was planning to spend the rest of the night in her bed — until one of his friends collapsed and nearly drowned from all the booze he had downed.
Britney’s bodyguards stepped in and ordered Mike to take his mate home.
Mike added: “In the end we had to say our goodbyes.”


Oh Britney... she is the gift that just keeps on giving.

SO excited.

yay!