Tuesday, May 08, 2007

When did Jessica Simpson become a porn star?

I understand she has good boobs, but it's like she can't even breathe against the fabric strapped to the girls. Top that off with the make-up on her face and the fake tan all over her body, and she looks like a walking blow-up doll- a pretty blow-up doll, but definitely something made out of plastic with many, um, holes. That just sounds wrong.


Here's a reason I haven't heard about why Britney Spears went all bonkers. I guess she might have been sexually assaulted, at least according to the upcoming National Enquirerer... here's the story:

The National Enquirer claims in a new cover story that Britney Spears was sexually attacked by someone who knew her in mid February, which prompted her to shave her head and spiral downwards. She is off her meds, talking in strange voices, and refuses to wear clothes in the house, they say.

Here’s how The Enquirer explains the incident:

Despite months of hard partying and substance abuse that ultimately landed her in rehab, The Enquirer has learned that Britney’s downward decline accelerated in mid-February when she was attacked in Miami by someone she knew who wanted to have sex with her.Although her rep denies this incident took place, sources say she hasn’t been the same since.Just three days after the assault, Britney… [shaved] her head.

[From National Enqurier print edition, May 14, 2007]We reported this rape rumor back in mid February. Supposedly Britney went into Cedars Sinai Medical Center, which is in LA, not Miami, after she shaved her head, and was there for unknown reasons. (Not a toothache.) Britney was in Miami alone with her two children in mid February, and she did leave earlier than planned. She originally planned to spend a full week at the Four Seasons resort there with her kids, but left after just a few days. As we reported at the time, a source told Us Weekly that “something happened” that made her want to hightail it out of there.It could be that The Enquirer received confirmation of this attack, or that they’re connecting the dots based on conjecture and already-known facts about Britney.The rest of the story focuses on the leaked flower boob pictures, and the weird video rant Britney gave to X17 in which she sarchastically said the world is so nice and talked about how her manager totally knew what he was doing by sending her go to rehab. She’s off her medication, they say, and is having mood swings and blaming everyone else for her breakdown.

We already knew this about Britney, but the part I found interesting is the fact that she plans to make sure her father, who spoke out in support of her ex-manager, Larry Rudolph, is not going to see a dime of her future earnings.Her ex, K-Fed, is also said to think she’s got a split personality and not to trust her:She’s currently in the process of trying to negotiate an end to her contract with Rudolph - which she only recently signed. And sources say that Britney will also cut off some of her family members financially, including her father Jamie, who has recently gone public with criticism of her conduct…

“Kevin feels like he’s been watching someone with a split personality,” said the source.“Kevin said he feels like he is talking to different people when he speaks to her.“One minute Britney is fine, and the next she is blowing up at him and the rest of the world. She’ll tell Kevin she is moving out of L.A. and quitting the business, and then in the next sentence say she is going on tour soon, so he better get his act together so he will be able to keep the kids full time.”[From National Enqurier print edition, May 14, 2007]

Write to Paris Hilton in jail...

...if she ends up going. Fingers crossed.
Century Regional Detention Facility (CRDF)
11705 South Alameda Street,
Lynwood, CA
Bus. Phone: (323) 568-4500
Watch Commander: (323) 568-4506
General Inmate Information, call: 213-473-6100

Inmate Mailing Address:
Inmate name and Booking Number11705
S. Alameda St.
Lynwood, Ca.

her booking number is 9424185

Monday, May 07, 2007

I'm shocked. SHOCKED! Well, not that shocked.

Sordid snaps of her snorting the drug and shoving it up a pal's nose was taken as she and two friends crammed into a club toilet during a wild night on the town. Then the Mean Girls star bragged to the others: "I'm going to New York tomorrow to f*** Jude Law."

The friend added: "Lindsay does not care who sees her do coke and where she does it." And she has not managed to stay off the booze either. "She carries round a water bottle to try to fool everyone into thinking she is clean but she tips the water out and refills it with vodka and soda." But she was caught out by a secret film made as she snorted the Class A drug at the exclusive Teddy's nightclub in Hollywood's Roosevelt Hotel. The video shows her arriving at 11pm and skulking round the toilets before creeping inside a cubicle. Wedged inside the loo with two friends, Lohan pulls a small bag of white powder from her jeans pocket. She dips her finger in and shoves the substance up one friend's nose before snorting some up her own. And this was filmed just 20 days after she proudly emerged from therapy. Lindsay, who starred with Jamie Lee Curtis in Freaky Friday, booked herself into the £20,000-a-month Wonderland treatment centre in Los Angeles earlier this year saying she wanted to get off booze. She checked out after a month and was back doing drugs at a Hollywood party within a week. Her friend said: "That night I saw her do more than 20 big lines of cocaine. She was still up doing drugs at 11am even though she had started about 8pm the night before. She wasn't even trying to hide it and was blatantly doing it off table tops, keys, books and in the wardrobe, where she was hunched over with her legs crossed almost bent in half doing it off some magazine on the floor. I remember looking at her and thinking how pathetic she looked and how out of control she had become. When she is on coke, which is most of the time, all the attention has to be on her. I have lost count of the number of times I have watched as she stripped naked in front of everyone. Then she loves to check herself out in the mirror as she parades around with her boobs hanging out. One night we had gone back to her place and, as always, as soon as she walked through the door she stripped down to her thong, bent down and snorted cocaine off her coffee table and then off her toilet seat."

But Lindsay is not only addicted to booze and drugs, she is also hooked on sex with some of Hollywood's hottest men, says our insider. "She has told me that she has slept with James Blunt, Jude Law, Calum Best, Joaquin Phoenix, Benicio Del Toro, Jared Leto and James Franco," admitted the friend. "She loves Brits and has told me she has slept with the singer James Blunt a few times over the past month. The last time was on April 15 after another house party. I think they went back to a hotel together afterwards. She is very protective over him and when she heard I had met him she sent me a text saying, ‘Stay away from him Bitch, he is mine.' Lindsay told me she has messed around with Leonardo DiCaprio a while ago too but claimed that she didn't sleep with him. She also flew to New York about two months ago to go to bed with Jude Law. Last November she slept with Calum Best. She didn't tell me if he was any good but she is usually too wasted to know what is going on anyway."

Lindsay was living it up with old pal Paris Hilton at the Coachella music festival in Palm Springs last week and almost falling out of her dingy grey bra top. In public Lindsay insists she is sober but, as our video stills show, she is still a hopeless addict and her friend claims the stint in therapy was just a stunt. She said: "Going to rehab was all for publicity. She wanted people to see her seeking help but it hasn't got her off the drugs at all. In an average night Lindsay will do two and half grams of coke on her own. She doesn't buy it—she is given it by friends and acquaintances, and it turns her into an angry monster. I have watched many a time Lindsay treating her staff like cr*p." Her friend is convinced that if she does not tame her wild ways she could meet a tragic end. "That's why I'm showing this video," she added. "So the world can know what Lindsay has been doing and she can't lie about it to herself or anyone else."

another lindsay looking like shit picture.

yeah, slow day.