Thursday, December 07, 2006

For the curious...

Here is a copy of the entire crazy e-mail that Lindsay Lohan sent out. It is ridiculously wonderful and typo-ridden. Ah, good times. Enjoy!

Subject: The way of the future-Howard Hughes once said.

I am willing to release a politically/morally correct, fully adequite letter to the press if any of you are willing to help. Simply to state my oppinions on how our society should be educated on for the better of our country. Our people. Also because I have such an impact on our younger generations, as well as generations older than me. Which we all know and can obviously see. People are just mean. I am going to proceed with putting LR to court if need be for what she's done to me. Its my life. I want to live it. People cannot lie and think that it is okay to continue on having done so. Simply because they will do it again to someone else, and that is not alright with me. I have had many ups and downs, as do we all.

But to make false accusations to one girl is unjust in my oppinion. Having said this, I am willing to do anything I need to get my life the way it should be and the way I work for it to be.. And have thus far in my career. Let's sue the tabloids for saying the things they say. Defamation of character. Amongst other illegal accusations, I will repeat this over and over to make my point. I am not fully aware of what these, again, accusations are, but I am fully and eagerly prepared to learn them. Have harvey and all lawyers help me please. If he is willing. Al Gore will help me he came up to me last night and said he would be very happy to have a conversation with me. If he is willing to help me, let's find out. Hilary Clinton, Bill Clinton, and Evan metroplis, and John Daur who works with them would be willing, if we just ask. If we just ASK. I'd really like to fix things and refuse to stop on any account for these unintelligent, vulgar people who like to hurt other people. Not just me, but everyone. I'm willing to hold a press conference and I will do anything necessary to do so. In putting an end to 'these people' trying to put an end to me and belittle me as well as try to be the demise of me after all I've gone through and done at such a young and tender age in a womans life. Its enough already, I've had enough and I am going to be the one to make a change. For all of my fellow actors, friends, people I admire and for those I've lost in the recent days, years, months. I do believe the focus in the world has misplaced and directed in the wrong directions and I am willing to be the one to help change that and use my celebrity status to move the focalpoint /(s) of the press to the real issues that we have going on as we speak. Anyone that is willing to help and has a family member or friend, even co-worker that is in a position to be involved in any way, shape or form, please contact me, Jenni Muro, Leslie Sloane, Michael Heller, Jason Sloane, Jason Weinberg as soon as you can or are willing. Just ask them, it doesn't hurt to ask. So let's start now, rather than waste time. Do you agree? Because I'm doing it either way. The way of the future. Thank you for your time.

Your Entertainer, Lindsay Lohan Sent wirelessly via BlackBerry from T-Mobile.

16 comments:

Seumas said...

First belly laugh of the day. Thank you. :)

I'd make some witty comment here, but the letter, sadly, completely speaks for itself.

Anonymous said...

wow.... Let the first stop in her mission be a competent tudor in the english language. I'm not sure, but T-Mobile may have grounds for damages for defamation of character.

Seumas said...

A tudor... heh.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

I don't think she would even do well in a 1970's Morrissey-Andy Warhol film. Flesh,Trash,Heat...those actors had talent! Miss Lohan is, poor white trash. And not in the good way.

gay bob said...

The deleted comment must have been really juicy, and slanderous, and illegal. I want to see it now!!

Anonymous said...

"Simply to state my oppinions on how our society should be educated on for the better of our country."

That's the most ironic statement I've heard since the "Mission Accomplished" sign on the USS Abraham Lincoln.

Thanks for sharing, Sarah. To see extent of the stupidity of our celebrities always brings a smile to my face.

Anonymous said...

She is an unintelligble ass.

Anonymous said...

Priceless. Mild paranoia coupled with delusions of grandeur. And did she just refer to herself as "young and tender?" HA!

Anonymous said...

What a stupid bitch. I hope she dies in a fire.

Anonymous said...

The comment removed was mine...I said, "Looks like Sarah's followers are less educated than Miss Lohan"...due to the great grammar and spelling. Don't know why that had to be removed...free speech and all.

Anonymous said...

Hey anonymous above this with the "censored" remark. Sarah's fans commenting here are just plain people having some fun on a blog; not self-indulgent "stars" who pathetically believe the public hangs on every word they say. If LiLo can't be any more liteate than this, she might stop believing she's Tolstoy and stay the hell out of sight for awhile!

Anonymous said...

DuH, Me jus' B a followa ov Mz. DYlan. Me not know how to SPeWll weall Gweat, But I knowz a Guud BLOG when I seez one ;)

Anonymous said...

LMAO theresa....

steve said...

If Lindsay Lohan had Henry VIII instruct her in the finer points of grammar she'd have an English Tudor tutor.

LiSh said...

I always THOUGHT she was developmentally disabled. Now I have proof.